TheMommyBlog

Sunday, June 29, 2008 Familybits

alex the girl is the very first weblog I ever saw, although I had no idea that that was what it was called. I didn’t use the word “blog” then. I started reading about her days, and kept coming back. I couldn’t tell which was more appealing: her designs, drawings, prose, or site design.

I thought, I want one of those. I want to be…not Alex, but a girl. You know what I mean.

I just went back after many years’ absence to discover to my surprise and delight that she is still there, still crafty, still prosey, still pretty. She’s still a girl.

She keeps changing her sites around, and can’t keep it down to just one site. Sounds familiar!

Here’s an elegant thought broken down into many, bit-sized elements. I suggest you read it and do some if not all of what she describes. I’m logging off after this to do some of those things myself.

Please go out there and do. Live. Don’t be the same as yesterday. Don’t live vicariously online. Don’t use language that has no meaning or talk ideas you don’t really live. Don’t hide. Don’t copy others or live their ideas or life. Don’t fear doing your thing. Don’t fear doing. Instead of reading a decorating magazine, paint that room. Instead of thinking of baking, do up a cake. Run, walk, bike. Put that self help book down and pick up yourself.

Let go of the snark, your worries, your anger and fear and give into possibility, action, joy and life. Do. Do some more. Stop thinking about you. Stop blogging about just you and your kid and your pet. There’s a world out there to connect to, really connect to. Being of use is more important than being popular. Think about the lady down the street, the person at the drive through, the man fallen in the street, about politics, the environment, healthcare, another country and then do something about it. Never stop at thinking. read more…

Friday, June 27, 2008 Other people who write

Felicia Sullivan is an author and marketing diva at Harper Collins with whom I’ve developed a warm, comfortable, email friendship. She sends me funny emails and fab books, and I send her…my address. No, no, I really admire her, both for her decidedly un-annoying marketing skills and for her heart-felt writing.

I just purchased her book, The Sky Isn’t Visible from Here, a book I’ve read about and heard about just about everywhere, but haven’t picked up because, frankly, my life has enough drama and roller coasters and her book sounds like The Matterhorn of memoirs. In a good way, of course, But I didn’t think I had the emotional reserves to actually read it.

Of course, I bought the book because she sent an email that made it tantalizing, impossible to resist, and important. Also, if I did buy it I could be entered into a giveaway. But still! The girl can persuade!

So I visited her blog. And stopped dead in my tracks. This post is one that I could have written, should have written, should have acted on long ago. How did she get inside my head?

I have to let go of the fact that my book didn’t sell as much as I wanted it to. I have to let go of the fact that my father isn’t always as present as I need him to be. I have to let go of the comforts of New York and all the memories buried within it. I have to let go of the fact that I will always have a deep relationship with The Student Loan Corporation. I have let go of “friends” who are determined to use. People who take advantage of your connections, your time and your kindness, and you can see their wheels churning as they imagine ven diagrams and line drawings - all the ways in which you can connect them to what they want. I have to let go of the fact that sometimes the world doesn’t work precisely how you want it to. I have to let go of the fact that I will always have to work harder for what I want - and maybe this isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Maybe, I’m realizing, it’s fine to have success on your own terms, know that you earned something completely rather than being the product of hype or “it girl” status. I’m not promising happy endings here, I’m just done wallowing.

This is my assignment, and yours, for the summer.

Let go.

I can’t promise to stop wallowing, but I can stop looking for pears on an apple tree.

Thursday, June 26, 2008 Fun Finds

I’ve been meaning to post about a DVD a reader sent to Daphne, knowing how much she likes princesses and…princesses. It’s called Prima Princessa Presents Swan Lake, and is “a hip, fun forty minute show for kids…Cool new twist on learning ballet, featuring the Paris Opera Ballet and students from the American School of Ballet.”

You know how educational/artsy videos usually fall into one of three categories? Too silly and not engaging enough to hold attention for the amount of time you need to shower or make dinner; too advanced for them to grasp the fun and purpose; and just right, but so short you have to spend all your time rewinding (or skipping the self-promotion that seems to take up half the tape).

Prima Princessa cleverly navigates each of these issues and offers short bursts of actual ballet lessons, scenes from the Paris Opera’s performance of Swan Lake, and adorable clips of little girls running around in tutus, imitating the dancers. Very, very cute.

Here’s the interesting part: I thought Daphne would be all over the little girls and not as much into the professional performance. Boy, was I wrong. (Well, I was right about one thing: she had to run for her ballet outfit so she could be properly attired while watching.)

For starters, she would not sit down to watch it. She stood in the middle of the living room floor, right in front of the TV, and studied that video to get all the moves down. She liked the little girls, enjoyed the classes, but was absolutely riveted by the ballet performance. Several times in a row, which was a score for me, because that meant 120 minutes of rapt enjoyment of educational entertainment while I scraped Lord knows what off the kitchen floors. Actually, that’s not true. I don’t scrape the floors because I know exactly what’s on them.

So I’ve got to agree with Cool Mom Picks that Prima Princessa is “Swan Lake on a Budget.” Daphne has never expressed such interest in ballet before, and is now dying to go see a real performance. This is the ticket to getting your little ones to look forward to and sit still during The Nutcracker, or maybe even expanding their tastes so you can go to the ballet outside of the Christmas season.

One more thing to put on the list for Things To Do With Redeeming Social Value That Are Actually Fun!

Available at Amazon.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008 Bad Mood Dude

Yep, it’s summer, the flowers are blooming, the kids are out of school, and I’m out of work. At least the theme is consistent. They shoot horses, don’t they?

The nonprofit I work for ran out of grant funds in May, and we’re not sure how long it will take to get new funding. Not in time for the mortgage, though! I checked with the camp office this morning to plead hardship and ask if I could shift some of the next three weeks to later in the summer, because, hey, I’m not working! And camp is hella expensive! And there’s no good way to say this, but what the hell: don’t know when child support will resume. Things are tough in both camps just now. I’ve got approximately ten percent of the mortgage payment in the bank, and am rifling my desk for uncashed checks, savings bonds, rings to sell…

So if you don’t see me or anything resembling a bubbly me for a bit, it’s because I’m busy redecorating Maslow’s basement.

Monday, June 23, 2008 Fun Finds

As it were.

There is so much that is right and wrong with this site; just try to pick on something and you will soon see the genius behind it, so to speak.

I sent it to my ex upon learning that he’d booked a camping trip with the kids over Dylan’s birthday.

What? I was trying to be helpful!

The Brown Company

Meanwhile, unless I want to drive out to the campsite on the second day of the trip, I won’t get to see him.