TheMommyBlog
Him: do you realize i have to have Websters open when i chat with you?
My French friend just pinged me to see where I’ve been…
Marie-Hélène: Hey ... here you are! just sent you an email.
Me: Hey - I have been in bed with the crud.
Marie-Hélène: I know-are you feeling good enough to get out ? I want to feed you.
Me: Mom already tried that.
Marie-Hélène: Hahaha!
Me: I can’t go more than twenty feet from the powder room.
Marie-Hélène: Ok….get better and tomorrow I will take you out.
Me: Tomorrow sounds great. Actually there is peach-braised pork in the fridge I think, so I’m not exactly suffering.
Marie-Hélène: Darn! I just had a lousy sandwich.
Me: You should just walk in and rummage the fridge! I’ll tell Phil I did it -there’s very little he wouldn’t believe when it comes to that.
Marie-Hélène: I almost sent him an email yesterday.
Me: Oh god not about the election.
Marie-Hélène: After I saw the article about the $150 000 expense for sarah palin wardrobe. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/27320899/
Fun with IMA) I’m not this guy; and
Two: I’m not telling this story on an IRC board.
GUYS, STORY TIME
SO my teacher’s friend’s friend or something
She was dogsitting one day
Shows up the first time, finds the dog dead on the floor, right?
how embarrassing
SO she’s gotta pack the dog corpse up and take it to the vet so they can dispose of it or whatever
She can’t find anything to fit it in, so she stuffs it in a freaking SUITCASE
She didn’t have a car so she has to take the train through Chicago
oh mannnn
This guy helps her carry the case on and is like
“this is pretty heavy, what’s in it?”
lady replies “just some computer things”
the guy SOCKS HER IN THE FACE AND RUNS OFF WITH THE CASE
ROFLMAO ROFLROFLROFL!!!
OMG ROOOOOOOOOFL
AHAHAHAHAHAHA HOW would you pawn that sort of thing???
Comment: True story.
Because I’m here, there and everywhere now that I’m unemployed, Phil is always trying to reach me during the day—via Yahoo IM, my cell, my home phone, email, Skype (until I left that nefarious position), and now iChat. I’m using iChat because a friend and I are collaborating on a new web business and it’s easiest to send files and bounce ideas.
Today, however, I thought I’d make it easy and went visible on Yahoo. Here’s the thing, though: when I go visible I always feel compelled to explain myself. I mean, it’s been at least a year since I’ve popped up, right? So I put in a new status message: “dropped my laptop, am exceedingly grumpy, backing up G5.”
Well, I haven’t heard from Phil yet, but the Blue Sloth found me.
Blue Sloth: “dropped your laptop…grumpy” ?
Blue Sloth: That’s your message?
Blue Sloth: And you expect anyone who knows you to come within five hundred yards of you?
Blue Sloth: Do you think we’re crazy?
Blue Sloth: Have a death wish. I’m suprised the keys don’t melt under you fingertips…........
Blue Sloth: *ducks and hides*
Blue Sloth: **and hides children**
Blue Sloth: ****and tries to think of place to hide your children****
So I responded:
themommyblog: that’s getting blogged
Blue Sloth: bigbluesloth has signed out
Fun with IMme: ok have hit bottom in discussing IM mannerisms on IM
me: and I just spent thirty seconds trying to think of a better word than mannerisms
her: not worth it though, was it?
me: no
Fun with IMThis was from a few days ago… and the funny thing is, I didn’t even know for sure who I was talking to in the dream.
themommyblog: just woke up from a bizarre dream
themommyblog: i was trying to IM you
themommyblog:: but the keyboard letters were all in a jumble in a box
themommyblog: and I couldn’t find them fast enough to make sense
themommyblog: and as you were waiting I was sure you would walk away thinking I wasn’t going to answer
themommyblog: so I started picking up letters at random to let you know I was still there
themommyblog: didn’t make any sense, but hey
themommyblog: and then I was reduced to scrawling letters on one of those magnetic doodle boards
themommyblog: but something about the IM technology wouldn’t read them
themommyblog: had to be an electronic signal, not shapes written in iron filament
themommyblog: doesn’t take an analyst to interpret that one
themommyblog: (though I think my friends can read a magnadoodle if pressed)
Fun with IMher: [person we both know] won’t even look at me anymore
me: ah, but he won’t get into heaven
her: hmmmmm are we going to heaven?
her: I always figured we’d be partying in hell =)
me: we will but hell by definition means he’ll be at the same table
her: how are the kids doing this summer?
me: sorry had to take Dylan’s hands out of the DVD slot
me: the boys are at Camp Galileo
me: and Daphne is at summer school
me: so I can look for work
me: and write
her: Camp Galileo…sciencey camp?
me: art and science
me: Logan is in pig heaven
her: oh I’m jealous
me: the guy was all we can’t get Logan to shut up in science
me: I said I almost felt sorry for them, signing him up
her: well he is an expert!
her: on almost everything!
me: and the art? omg
me: we were reading a bedtime story about a mouse visiting the art museum
me: and her favorite was the Degas dancing girl
me: and I said remember when you guys drew her?
me: and then the mouse saw Pollack and didn’t get it
me: and Logan said
me: get this
her: *waiting with bated breath*
me: well there are no objects in his art—he paints what he’s feeling, so you really shouldn’t look for THINGS
her: WOW!
her: I was in college when I learned that crap!
me: I bet that’s verbatim from camp
me: they studied Pollack this week
her: teeheehee wow kids these days
me: no shit
her: well maybe in a year or so you can have him watch the ed harris movie
Fun with IMhim: how are the wonder triplets?
me: wonder triplets?
me: fighting a lot
me: Dylan is nearly unmanagable
him: with you or each other
me: both
me: nothing fazes him
him: is it a stage?
me: i started a nice and naughty bean system
me: i hope so
me: each time he hurt someone or yelled poopy talk
me: a bean went from one to the other
me: by nine a.m. there were fifty beans in the naughty jar
me: he loved it
him: hmm
me: it was like
me: DIAPER!
me: bean
me: DIAPER!
me: bean
me: DIAPER!
me: bean
me: bah
him: I’m sure you’ll figure something out
him: more draconian
him: you can poo poo all you like
me: almost spit coffee
me: have been disciplining for use of that phrase
him: poo?
him: shit
me: poopoopeepeediaperface
him: I curse like a sailor around the kids
me: i yelled get your fucking shoes on to Logan yesterday
me: he was shocked
me: and so distraught
me: wanted to go to store with me
me: but was wearing swimsuit
me: cognitive dissonance
me: told him to jump in car
me: but he needed undies and shorts
me: actually came down the walk naked with a shirt covering himself, crying
me: didn’t know what to do
me: i said it’s ok to go in your trunks!!!
me: after waiting at the curb with Daph for twenty minutes
me: he was in agony with the mismatch
him: oh geez
him: poor guy
me: OCD
him: brain not up to your speed right now
him: ocd?
me: obsessive compulsive disorder
him: right
me: we used to call him ocd boy
me: not to his face
me: not to get him to the dinner table or anything
Fun with IMThing 2: you’re the biggest pain in the…
Thing 2: never mind
Thing 1: yeah yeah
Thing 1: takes one to know one
Thing 2: whistles
Thing 1: look there isn’t anything we can say to one another on THAT subject
Thing 1: *ducks
Thing 2: somber voice
Thing 2: yes you are correct
Thing 2: I am the worlds biggest pain in the ass
Thing 1: we can trade days
Thing 2: no
Thing 2: it’s okay
Thing 2: we’re far enough away
Thing 2: I’m not threatened by your scope of evil
Thing 1: right we can both hog the title
Fun with IMSometimes, what you need to hear comes along at exactly the right time…
Fun with IMFor lack of anything more exciting to post, I dug up a scrap from a while ago that could actually have happened on any given day.
P.S. I recall doing a post last year with a similar theme…
Fun with IMhim: Just feelin’ a bit low, low, low, I guess…
him: Changes with the wind…
me: join the club—we have jackets
him: Wow. It must be difficult to find a jacket designer to make a jacket with a bunch of fingers pointing at the word “loser”...
me: we just do the “L”
me: on a crest
him: Crest: Thumb and forefinger…
me: and the elite members? Have it pointing the wrong way
me: as if they were reading it instead of others
him: Hmmm… I’ll have to check mine. I think it’s a depiction of God giving me the bird…
me: or laughing
him: or both…
me: covering the phone and making talky hands to the angels
me: twirling his finger at his head
him: For guys I think it’s a lightning bolt to the groin…
me: forget where I heard this: there is no devil, just God when he’s drunk
Fun with IMSince it’s already tomorrow in Europe (well, it is here, too, but it’s an ungodly hour), I tried to ping Amber to wish her a happy birthday, but she has thoughtlessly left her computer to do “other things.”
So I pinged her better other half. No luck. How can they enjoy her birthday if they are not breathlessly awaiting my involvement??
Go over and say Happy Birthday,, and tell her Auntie Mindy sent you!
(And for eight whole months, baby, I get to be just one year older than you!!)
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