Me, Me, MeIt’s true what they say: you should never shop for groceries while you are hungry. It wasn’t even 11 a.m. and I was almost fainting with hunger, so I hopped in my car to get some lunch. Did I go to the little Italian Deli across the street and get a roast beef sandwich like a good little girl?
Noooo, I thought, hey! Why don’t I mosey over to Safeway, and then I can pick up a few others things we need. Don’t know what that would be, but it’ll come to me.
First stop: cookie aisle. Mmmmm, bite-sized Nutter Butters. Daphne and Dylan love those! Two bags: one for home and one for work! And Mint Milanos!
Next.. some cheese and crackers to steady my blood sugar. And one of those oriental chicken salads.
And some wine for later would be nice! Amber’s comment on Genuine’s post about red wine really got me going, so I’ll just pick up some Bordeaux to see what the fuss is about. One, two, three… oh! Ten percent discount if you buy six bottles! [sweeps lot into basket]
Oh, and the candy bowl next to the file room is empty, so I’ll just pick up some M&Ms… peanut… and peanut butter… and plain of course… on second thought, better get two of each.
There. Vice central. And I got carded! Yay! What the hell is going on lately?? I haven’t been looked at twice in the last few years, but all of a sudden people are peering closely and scanning my ID. Love it!
So I get back to the office, open the bags of goodies, pour them into the bowl (pausing to listen for my officemates to come running like hungry little kitties), and sit at my desk with my salad and treats.
Hm. What’s that reminder flashing on my screen? Oh. My dentist appointment. Due in one minute. Shit. There goes $50 for a no-show! I don’t care--it’s worth it!!
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My son was in the same room as me when I was getting dressed one day. I scratched the top of my left breast a little and he said, “Mommy, you are touching your —-!”
I said to him, “I just have an itch,” to which he responded, “That’s *your* excuse!”
Jet, 4
Jax: Mommy, here’s a little piece of toilet paper to wipe the tip.
Mommy: The tip of what?
Jax: Your penis.
Jax, 3
After being told to go outside and pick up the dog poop, he goes outside, whines and complains. He comes back in and says, “Mom, I think the dog over-pooped.”
Luke, 8
When I woke up one morning with a sore throat, raspy voice, and fever, my three-year-old, Emilie, asked me what was wrong. I said, “Mama has a cold…” and she felt my cheek for a minute before saying, “No. You has a hot!”
Emilie, 3
Do you know how I memorized 2 x 11? I have this fake pencil in my brain, and it writes down the multiplication!!
Hugo, 6
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04.14.04 at 11:20 AM |
Tell em you were in a car wreck because once done with lunch that’s how you will feel!
04.14.04 at 11:26 AM |
I’d much rather do what you did than go to the dentist. Can I have some of those peanut butter M&M;’s?
04.14.04 at 12:15 PM |
I try to avoid groceries when I am hungry too.
04.14.04 at 12:42 PM |
Hey, you may need that dentist appointment considering your purchases
No judgements, I’m just as bad! (Hey, I justed checked the dictionary to see if I was spelling judgement correctly and did you know it can be spelled judgement OR judgment??) Anyway…
04.14.04 at 01:11 PM |
Oopsie!
04.14.04 at 04:40 PM |
Dang...can I eat lunch with you?
04.14.04 at 09:21 PM |
Peanut Butter M&M;’s?????????????? Living here on this island in the middle of B.F. Idaho, (in the Persian Gulf, actually) where the DO eventually bring American products, I see that I am missing out on something EXTREMELY IMPORTANT. How depressing. I love M&M;’s. sigh. I didn’t know they had PEANUT BUTTER M&M;’s. M&M;’s I have here, but that type, erm no.
Actually I ‘m pretty proud of you. I would have probably bought a jumbo bag of nacho cheese doritos too, and, gee, so many other things. I applaud you’re restraint. I am appalled that you didn’t get that roast beef sandwich! YUMMMMM!!!!!
Im hungry now. Thanks babe!
*note to self, email mom and tell her to send me some in the care package she’s planning to send*
04.14.04 at 10:06 PM |
Ha ha ha ha! I just blogged about the same exact thing!
04.15.04 at 06:20 AM |
The big question is: Did the Mint Milanos make it to the freezer or did you eat them before you got back to the office?