TheMommyBlog

me: am hunched over the laptop in bed with daph next to me
me: can’t see for shit
amber: hehe
me: hence the typing
amber: I just crawled out of bed
amber: stayed up waaaaay too late
me: good for you sleeping in
amber: 4am
me: I saw!!!
amber: not so good
me: Len too
amber: yeah
amber: just talking and having a laugh
me: you are not going to like this but the rats in the attic are having a barn dance or something
me: good for you
amber: there was a little vodka involved too
me: heeeee
me: good
amber: aaaaaaaaaaarghh!
amber: rats!
amber: you really have rats?
me: I have no idea what they are doing but is sounds like construction is involved
amber: my mom had them in her attic once
me: when it rains, sometimes they find a way in
amber: scared the shit out of me
me: we blocked everything a few years ago but they must have found a new entrance
amber: I was about 18 at the time
amber: and it’s not scurrying they do
me: yes, they move around at night and I can hear them skittering along the beams
amber: it’s like thumping
me: YES
me: do si do
amber: like they are murdering a human or something
me: haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
amber: or eating one alive!!!
me: *wonders if the children are all in bed
amber: OMG my hands are sweating
amber: really!
me: Philip will love this
me: have to post it in keeping with my banal promise
amber: I think he thinks I’m kidding
me: you are NOT
amber: he loves to just mention it
me: yes, virtual head noogies
amber: like under the house
amber: hehe
me: my friend in Spain does that
me: I once saw a mouse stuck to that fly paper stuff and it reallllly bothered me
amber: Maybe he needs a virtual snuggy
me: and this was in 1985
amber: hehe
me: and for YEARS he sent me rat-related presents
me: once it was a six-inch gummy rat
amber: now my pits are sweating!!
me: haaaaaaaaa
amber: *snort*
me: *trying not to wake the baby
amber: oh and the underwear thing
me: *or listen to the fiddles upstairs
amber: ew
me: ha
amber: hair dryer!
amber: ew!!!!!!!
me: yes she needs to do laundry more often
me: I was kidding
me: I’ve never done that
amber: wouldn’t that cause the room to smell!
amber: heh
me: without WASHING them first!!!!
amber: I have taken a pair of baby socks out to the dryer
amber: no washer
me: good lord woman what do you take me for?
me: (did that come out Scottish?)
amber: and tried to dry them with the drier
amber: hehe
amber: was it in your head?
me: a little
amber: hehe
me: amazing how you have rubbed off
amber: anyway, I caught the socks on fire
me: and it’s only when I shout
me: *ponders
me: no!
amber: heh
amber: yip!
me: niiiice
me: a fit mother
amber: oh yes!
me: “Here, wrap the blanket round her toes no one will notice”
me: “Is something burning?”
me: “no just a bit of gas”
amber: heh
me: “you really should stop smoking”
amber: I shouldn’t have attached them to the nozzle of the dryer
me: “It’s not good for the baby”
me: haaaaaaaaaaaaa
amber: they puffed up with air!
amber: then poof!
me: did you duct tape them there??
amber: heeeeeeeee
amber: no!
amber: my hands were on them
me: I’m picturing flames shooting out the little pink toe seams
amber: *panic*
amber: they were red!
me: even better
me: (to begin with?)
amber: you know the portrait of H * H?
me: oh no
amber: they matched those outfits
me: “matched”
amber: hence the bare feet in the photograph
amber: yes
me: did you have to scorch the pants to make it all blend?
amber: hehe
amber: just got it!
amber: no, but if I knew you did that
me: I always do bare feet in portraits
amber: I would have too!
amber: oh, you mean pants
amber: not undies ?
me: people think it’s cute but it’s really because I can’t be bothered buying nice shoes that match
me: sorry
amber: cheapskate!
me: that came out in American English
me: I wasn’t shouting
amber: where is your Scottish woman
amber: !!
me: heeeeeee
amber: no
me: buried under two generations
amber: that would be… Where is your Scottish… Woman!!
amber: not your Scottish woman
me: Head! Pants! Now!
amber: hee
amber: as in Heeed!
amber: Oi Heeeeed!
me: yes wasn’t sure how to spell it
me: the “now” would be really hard to spell phonetically
amber: I am still sweating with the rat thing
amber: noo
amber: Noo
me: glad I could be of assistance
amber: or New
me: woke up at one just to brighten your day
me: catch you at the beginning
amber: heh
amber: I wasn’t going to bathe today
amber: but I have to now
me: plus I needed more IM drivel to post
amber: thanks!
me: I read that as I have to GO
amber: hehe
me: duh
me: remember I am in a dark red room
amber: so you didn’t like the mirror answer?
me: omg I laughed so hard
amber: I thought it was sooooooooooooo funny
me: I don’t know why he thought I didn’t like it
me: he kept offering to take it down
amber: did you ever comment on it?
amber: ???
me: and I was like nooo you have to keep it there if only to go with your comment!
me: um, no
amber: he was worried about upsetting you
me: I know
me: that may have been why I was shouting at him
me: *whistles
amber: heh
amber: he is ‘seriously’ funny
me: yes
me: I could just see his face as he was writing it
me: all pleased with himself
me: on a tear
me: just like you with your blessing post
me: I DIED
amber: I think he should do a weekly side column
me: yes
amber: king of double entendre
me: Emperor
amber: GOD
me: for Life
amber: for infinity
me: yeah well we put him up there we can take him back down
me: little peacock
amber: not so sure…
amber: he was *that* funny when I met him!
me: that was single entendre
me: I know
me: he kills me
me: the only other guy who gets me giggling like that is my dad, and HIS dad was from Glasgow
me: is he all hung over>
amber: still sleeping
me: Scots
me: go turn him out of bed
amber: he would not be pleased
me: I would just responded to everything with “And have you got a contract yet sweetie?”
me: tiy should do it
amber: who’s Tiy?
amber: *cackle*
me: you
amber: heeeeee
me: I CAN’T SEE THE KEYBOARD
amber: I can’t even type when I CAN see it
me: WOMAN
amber: Gonnae no dea that!
me: I CAN"T SEE THE FECKIN THING
me: SO OFF WITH YE
amber: na, that would just be PISS OFF
me: PISS OFF THE LOT OF YE
amber: or GONNAE PISS OFF
amber: hehe
me: love it
amber: that would be FUCK THE LOT OF YE
me: yes
me: AND YER BRUDDERS
me: ok I have to edit this before it gets out of control and get some sleep
me: aaaaaaggghhh daph woke up
me: GONNAE NO DEA THAT
me: ok sweets, give him a kick from me when he wakes up
amber: k
me: and tell him we made fun of his accent
amber: bye
me: bye