I was just having a very uplifting conversation with Dylan, though I have no idea why—it was an hour after I tucked up in for the second time.
He snuggled up under my arm and said, “I could never have a better mom.” I hugged him back and told him he was my special son. He patted my thigh, and said, “Your legs are wider. Look.”
“Hmmm?”
“Mom, your legs are getting bigger.”
“Oh really?”
“Yeah, look.”
“Is that alright with you? I have gained some weight.”
Totally ignoring the out I’d offered him, he asked, “Well, when are you going to start losing weight?”
I can ignore things too.
“Is exercise what makes you lose weight?”
“Yep, that’s the best way. And when do you think I’ll be doing that?”
“You have an exerciser right here,” he pointed out, indicating my elliptical where I tuck all my computer cases and peripherals.
“I don’t know,” I said sarcastically, “My kids keep getting out of bed once I tuck them in.”
“Well,” he thought carefully, “You could do it all night.”
I let him fall asleep on the chair behind me until I was ready to go to bed.
Stupid thighs.
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My son was in the same room as me when I was getting dressed one day. I scratched the top of my left breast a little and he said, “Mommy, you are touching your —-!”
I said to him, “I just have an itch,” to which he responded, “That’s *your* excuse!”
Jet, 4
Jax: Mommy, here’s a little piece of toilet paper to wipe the tip.
Mommy: The tip of what?
Jax: Your penis.
Jax, 3
After being told to go outside and pick up the dog poop, he goes outside, whines and complains. He comes back in and says, “Mom, I think the dog over-pooped.”
Luke, 8
When I woke up one morning with a sore throat, raspy voice, and fever, my three-year-old, Emilie, asked me what was wrong. I said, “Mama has a cold…” and she felt my cheek for a minute before saying, “No. You has a hot!”
Emilie, 3
Do you know how I memorized 2 x 11? I have this fake pencil in my brain, and it writes down the multiplication!!
Hugo, 6
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07.10.07 at 05:35 AM |
I still think of you as the supermodel who blogs.
07.10.07 at 02:27 PM |
As long as you can still hold a sheet of paper between your knees you’ll be fine. A sheet of paper, not a sheaf.
07.10.07 at 09:31 PM |
Oh you’re hot and you know it
Be glad you aren’t plus-mommy like me, with your son in the dressing room at SuperWalmart. I was trying on shorts and they just weren’t comfy enough for the gym.
So my son wanted to know why I wasn’t getting them. I said they weren’t comfy enough. He said LOUDLY “Is that because you’re fluffy???”
At least I can laugh about it *now*.
07.11.07 at 12:18 PM |
This reminded me of the other day.. I told my son.. “Mommy is goin’ on a diet!” Son says, “That’s great Mommy!, looks me up and down and says… You didn’t start yet did you???”
Aye yi yi…
I love my kids!