TheMommyBlog

Thursday, February 18, 2010 Family

Here it is! If you know of someone looking in the Los Gatos/Bay Area, CA for a GREAT house to raise a family in, or entertain, this is perfect. One of those great kitchens to which everyone seems to gravitate at parties. Fab paint throughout. Bitchin’ wisteria that covers the whole back pergola over a dining area.

See for yourself—the virtual tour.

As you know, I’m motivated and might be extra flexible if you say you saw it on The Mommy Blog! Bonus: the master bath has to be gutted and remodeled… wouldn’t you love to get to pick what goes in it? Here’s a chance to decorate it yourself!

Monday, February 15, 2010 Bad Mood Dude

I think people who are going to work intimately with me on long-term projects should remember what I do for a living, and know that I try very hard never to stray from the high road.

But they should keep it in mind.

White fucking chenille couch and shag carpet that my kids have to stay off of for the couple of months we’re selling the house, my ass. Oh, and you’re bringing in photo prints so I should take down the Chagalls? Okey doke.

Monday, February 15, 2010 Bad Mood Dude, Family

I’m up again at the crack of six to start the day, hauled ten bins to the POD, swept up an orchid I kicked across the room last night in sheer frustration and exhaustion, and started making coffee.

I’m doing that thousand-yard stare out the window over the sink when this… clown…car? Pulls up in front of the house. Huh, could be lost. No, they are looking right at me, with the water running over the top of the coffee pot in my disbelief. I opened to door because, really, I needed to hear this.

“We’re here to take measurements for the termite company.” He was actually carrying a measuring wheel, so I shrugged and said have at it, and then went back to have another look at the car. It was a mini-compact-wee-car with brightly appliqued side advertising for—I kid you not—Animal petting for parties, a logo for Kiddieworld, and another I didn’t catch before they drove off, but I sure hope it had something to do with termites because that would be the all-time champion side-of-the-car business sticker. I did notice the slogan: “Three businesses to serve your needs!” Well, I now need a drink. Does that thing have a tap of Jaeger in the dash?

Now that I’ve delivered that last up-to-the-ceiling carload of stuff to my cousin, including a life-sized black Spidey-doll and a 40 of Malt Liquor, there are only a few things left that I’ve been storing for people. Mr. X needs to pick up his bike, battery jumper, some art, and a suede jacket I was sorely tempted to “forget” was his. It’s very nice. Trouble is, he’s thrown his back out and my bloody, battered hands can barely close to carry things (and you should see how much correcting I’m doing as I type along) so we have a Mexican standoff. Either he’s got to come get everything or I’m going to have to load up my car again and take it to him.

And I got an email from the Realtor this morning asking if I was ready for our exciting! Week! Ahead! Depending on the definition of “ready” I have sterilized the children’s rooms and most of mine, the other rooms just need a final bulldoze—I was literally using my forearm to sweep things off surfaces into huge rubber bins last night—so we can stage the furniture. I’m beginning to wonder how we’re going to live here. I mean, we still live here, am I right? Only, now it doesn’t feel like it and I’m tempted to go rent another place before this one sells so we can relax. And yes, I’m aware of the added expense, but as long as I have to tent the house and tear out the entire Master Bath, there’s not much point in staying, is there?

So. Checklist. Today: housing inspector and staging. Tuesday: In-house Realtor tour. Wednesday: virtual tour photographer from Sacramento. Thursday and Friday I contemplate my navel. Saturday and Sunday: open house. The following Wednesday: All-out Realtor tour. Must remember to move smelly shoe bin to garage. And sweep up in there.

There had better be a good lump of cash at the end of all this, because I will need it for meds and recovery. And massages. And you know, maybe I should just take everyone away for the summer and rent a vacation house for a couple months until we can come back fresh. And then someone will just give us a new house out of the kindness of their hearts and maybe the rest of my family might even want to know where we’ll be living. Haven’t heard from anyone outside my mom and stepdad about the move, I dunno, maybe it’s not as big a deal as it seems. Or maybe I’m feeling petulant. Probably the latter.

Coffee!

Sunday, February 14, 2010 Family

Andrew is good to go, but looks like he’s getting a little impatient waiting for Lola to finish putting her face on.

Me? Just got back from Target where I dropped another hundred dollars on bins. I’m rockin’ the living room and kitchen tonight. No one should live anywhere longer than three years. Too much STUFF.